Monday, February 21, 2011

Thridteen Possible Side Effects of PhDism

  1. You may feel like you went out for a walk and missed the sign for marathon.
  2. You may make a list of ten things to do and do them all ... not today. But tomorrow! Or the day after, better today or tomorrow or ... let's PROCRASTINATE!
  3. Facebook has a log-out button?! (You might as well wonder about the log-in button).
  4. You may feel like screaming (or bursting into flames).
  5. You may feel like strangling someone (you may imagine human dartboard cards too).
  6. Okay, let's find THE theory (if you don't find it, just go to the movies, that might help, if not you at least haven't spent the evening pondering on it).
  7. You may find out talents you never knew you had. Maybe you are a sky diver, cannonball or astronaut. (If you don't find any, you might as well just found a company, or start a family).
  8. You may feel like night but it is day or is it night? Doesn't matter, there is only light after the deadline, which is before the deadline, which is ... GO TO BED AND SLEEP!
  9. Where are your friends, and if they ask, what will you tell them about your progress and what it is that you do? (If you haven't spoken in a while due to deadlines, see rehearsing for it as an excellent opportunity to recover your voice).
  10. You may end up explaining the universe and its existence but not have a clue. What is reality? And is it true? Objectively? Subjectively? What is it that you think you think you do?
  11. You may question any reason behind doing a PhD ... if at all, does it make any sense ... does it not ... does it ... or not ... and is it of any importance whether it does or not ... if not at all, why not, and if at all, why not not ... aah, just SKIP that part and KEEP GOING! Or maybe not? NO, just KEEP GOING!
  12. And the most vicious one: You may end up doing nothing at all because there is just too much to do, which again leads to point number two.